I’ve always had a thing for ‘the dress’. You know the one – the party dress that made you feel like magic, the wedding outfit you agonised over for months, or the outfit you wore that made you feel like a walking exclamation mark! For many of us, every big moment in life had a statement outfit, and I always showed up for those moments in full sparkle. Self Lovebomb. However, somewhere between those milestones and everyday life, I started shrinking and I saved the ballgown energy for “special occasions,” and toned it down the rest of the time. I didn’t realise it then, but I was fidgeting through life in outfits – and identities – that didn’t quite fit.

Once upon a time, I was doing everything “right.” I was successful in work, raising the family, blending in and ticking boxes like a pro. On paper, I had it all: the 2.4 life, the smiles, the carefully curated clothes. I was living what I thought was a happy life – but deep down, I was only shining on energy-saving mode.

Being in the care system as a child, I’d learned early on that standing out could make people uncomfortable. That being “too much” – too bright, too bold, too sparkly – could lead to criticism, rejection, or worse, loneliness. So, I made it my mission to fit in, to please, to blend…

My sparkle? I dulled it down just enough to be palatable.

My voice? I softened it.

When I started my business my branding was designed around what I thought was acceptable in the business world – not what truly reflected me!

But the truth is, blending in is exhausting. Like wearing an off-the-peg outfit that itches in all the wrong places, it’s uncomfortable and restrictive. I was fidgeting through life and business, adjusting constantly to fit into someone else’s vision of success.

Then one day, something shifted. I realised in an introduction with my bland business card, that I apologised with the statement “it’s not really me” and in that moment, instead of dimming down, I felt this deep urge to show up fully – in my full-beam and unapologetic sparkle. I put on my metaphorical ballgown – bold, glittery, and unmistakably me. From that moment I consciously poured everything into being the real me, not to shine the light on me, but to create joy for others. It was my way of saying, “Thank you for being part of my story.” And, for the first time, I realised: this is what true alignment feels like.

Some loved it. Others didn’t. But for once, that didn’t matter. I had given myself permission to show up, full sass, no apologies. That moment was a turning point - not just in how I showed up in business, but in my life too.

Have you ever noticed how it's totally acceptable to shine a little brighter at the weekend? You pull out your favourite outfit, your sassiest shoes, or maybe just that accessory that makes you feel like you. You dance a little more freely, laugh a little louder, maybe even sparkle unapologetically. But come Monday? We tone it back down, dress it down, mute our magic. Why is that? Why do we allow ourselves to shine for just two days a week and shrink the rest of the time?

As startup founders and entrepreneurs, we’re often told how we ‘should’ show up. What our brands ‘should’ look like. How we ‘should’ speak, dress, post, perform… “Should” has become this suffocating standard - a word I’ve since thrown in the bin. Because chasing “should” dilutes your uniqueness and makes you forget that your magic lies in your ‘coulds’.

Now, I build brands for others that fit like ballgowns – made-to-measure, full of personality and power. I help founders step into the spotlight in ways that feel like them – not like a copy of someone else’s highlight reel. Because when you show up as your authentic, whole-hearted self, something magical happens: you attract your kind of people and the life you've been wishing for. 

Like attracts like.

Joy brings joy.

Sparkle sparks sparkle.

You stop trying to be for everyone, and start being deeply right for the ones who matter.

You can’t build a legacy in an ill-fitted ballgown, fidgeting and constantly trying to fit in. You build it by flaunting your difference.

So, my advice? Stop hiding the things you’ve been told are “too much.” That accent, that love of pink, that wild laugh, that bold idea - they’re your biggest assets. They’re what make you unforgettable and instantly recognisable.

It’s time to step into your business ballgown. Be your own brand of brilliance. Be sassy, not sorry. And for goodness’ sake, stop fidgeting – (said in love of course).

Take time to write down three-five of your sparkly bits – the traits that make you uniquely you. Then find ways to turn them up, not tone them down. Anchor and amplify your audacious self.

You don’t need a reason to shine – you are the reason!

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