To change my life, I had to change me. The journey from suppression, low self-worth and lack of boundaries, through a multitude of challenges including every kind of domestic abuse, serious illness, near death and bankruptcy – to lasting and relentless resilience, positivity, confidence, happiness, and inner peace, has made me an award-winning advocate for women and resilience role model in overcoming adversity and rising to challenge. Survival from adversity is a choice we make, a choice we can all make – with the right attitude, support and tools.

Believe me, in the bad times, I cried oceans and howled like a wolf in pain many a time, yet now, as an authentically confident and strong woman, my life’s purpose is to help others step into their power and never feel powerless again.

“Simply said, Susie sprinkles magic dust, hope and belief at exactly the time it's needed!" Sharron Lowe, global speaker and author.

Obedience      

My school was ruled by fear and was one of the most negative and unfulfilling periods of my life. Obedience and conformity were demanded, with humiliation doled out openly to both staff and pupils. When I left at the age of sixteen, I didn’t have an assertive bone in my body. With no idea what I wanted to do with my life, I trained as a secretary, but while working as a PA I endured many ‘#metoo’ moments from those in authority.

I was expected to be obedient at home and in my first marriage. With an emotionally screwed up childhood (from the age of eleven, my mother made me her ally which made me feel like a traitor to my father), I suffered from low self-worth and an ongoing need to justify my very existence.

Feeling unworthy and inferior with zero confidence had dire consequences, particularly on health (emotional and physical), relationships, and finances. Thinking that love would complete me led me into three disastrous marriages. I was actually grateful that someone wanted to marry me, and I believed in every one of my husbands. Hmm!

A flavour of each husband

No 1: After throwing hot tea in my face when I said I wanted a divorce:

“You can’t leave me, you promised to obey.”

No 2 and father of my daughters: After I asked whether he or his mistress had initiated the end of their eight-month affair, my husband shouted at me: “She’s really suffering alright!” Quietly reminding him that I too was suffering, I knew at that moment our marriage was finally over.

No 3: After we married, I paid for all mine and my girls’ expenses. Once, I borrowed £850 from my husband to do a course for work. During a row about money, I asked him how much he thought I owed him. “£15,000” he bellowed. I picked up my jaw from the floor and asked him how he had come to that figure - and this was his response. “Because I’ve fed you and put a roof over your head these past few years.”

Stronger self. better life

So, having married three men with either addictive or controlling personalities, and endured so much pain and unhappiness with other relationships, it was time to take stock. As the saying goes: “If you don’t learn the lesson, the lesson keeps coming to you”. I must have been a slow learner!

But learn, I did. Using everything I learned from my own traumatic experiences and the wisdom I’ve absorbed from some of the world's most powerful mentors, I steadily transformed into a new woman. Now, through my 10-week Mastering Mental Toughness course I empower others to become self-aware, to develop mental toughness where needed, to create strong boundaries, resilience, and grow all aspects of ‘the self’ from self-regulation to genuine self-love.

"Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom."  Aristotle

Self-awareness is the key to wisdom. To truly make wise decisions in life, we must first understand our own thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. By recognising our strengths, weaknesses, sensitivities, values, and motivations, we can begin the journey of personal growth. This awareness enables us to align our actions with our true values – our true ‘self’ – leading to more intentional and meaningful choices.

This is where the MTQPlus assessment comes in. Paired with a 90-minute follow-up session with me, this unique tool helps uncover valuable insights about your mindset and resilience. Together, we will explore your results and work on developing a clearer path to personal growth and effective decision-making.

There is no age, culture, or background to protect women from lack of self-worth and confidence – and the abuse this often brings. Aside from damaging relationships, perhaps something here resonates with you:

• One in ten women over fifty suffer from low levels of self-esteem
• British women have the lowest self-esteem in the world, with 80% unhappy with the way they look
• One third say that they no longer feel like the person they once were
• Women in the 21st century face huge self-image and self-belief issues, with media and other external influences potentially making many feel anxious and insecure

(Sources: The Women and Equalities Committee in the House of Commons, Dove Global and A. Vogel)

If we don’t take ourselves seriously, others won’t either. When we treat ourselves with kindness and compassion, we send a message to others that we are worthy of being treated with respect. When we know our value – really know it – we begin to attract abundance and joy into our lives. It is never too late (or too early) to achieve authentic confidence in our core selves as women who can enjoy life to the full – both personally and professionally, as of course each impacts the other.

Turning pain into purpose

Drawing on my personal and professional challenges, and as a self-love mentor and mental toughness practitioner, I am here to help you reclaim your resilience and inner power, and to believe in you until you are fully able to believe in yourself.

“I am inspired and motivated by your mentoring. Having to fight daily my issues with imposter syndrome and generally on a day-to-day basis not feeling 'good enough’, I remember what was shared and what I learned and it seriously helps me more that any HRT or counselling could.” Chair of NHS Area Women's Network

“After leaving my narcissistic husband, Susie helped me believe in myself again; she gave me hope that I would eventually feel better about myself. I told her things that I hadn’t told anyone as I felt she completely understood. She’s an incredibly positive person and by just being around her, that positivity seemed to rub off on me. My life has turned around and I now feel like a bird released!” Client

I provide one-to-one mentoring and unique and powerful online and in-person programmes: ‘Mastering Mental Toughness’ to enable women to become self-empowered – to dive deep and become truly confident in who they are as women, regardless of their situation, background, culture, career, age, size, shape. It is all about the woman within and her innate sense of ‘self’.

Unstoppable you starts here

True empowerment must include financial independence. This was a lifelong challenge for me, but thanks to the UK StartUp Loan through SWIG, I gained the tools and resources I needed to take control of my financial future. That support set me on the path to independence, and for that, I will always be grateful.

Your past does not define you – your choices do. We all have the strength within us to reclaim our worth and create the life we deserve. It’s never too late to step into our power and embrace the confident, resilient person we were always meant to be. The time is now to believe in ourselves and take the first step.

If you're ready to transform your life, I’m here to help you. Reach out today, and let’s begin your journey to true confidence and self-empowerment.