Don’t burn out following your dreams – how founders can build a business without losing themselves

Why resilience matters, how to recognise the signs of stress and some simple ways to protect your wellbeing while building the business you’ve always dreamed of…

Whoooo! You did it! You’re an entrepreneur, a business owner, a director. Well done you! It feels great, doesn’t it? The flexibility, the long business lunches, being your own boss. Finally, you’re doing something you love.

Ummmm. Does it though?

Or is it more like: “Oh my goodness, how do I get clients?”

Find out where they hang out. Get your niche. Work out your content pillars and posting strategy. Should you be on Instagram, LinkedIn, Facebook, Substack, or YouTube? What on earth is Meta Business Suite? And don’t forget your ring light!

You figure it out. You get some clients. Hooray!

But then come the questions. How many clients do I actually need? What about my bills? Should I be charging more? Where’s the next piece of work coming from?

And on it goes…

I know how overwhelming this can feel. Running a business is exciting, but there’s an awful lot to think about, particularly when you’re starting out. You might have left a secure job, be building something alongside your day job, or be trying to turn a passion into a sustainable business.

Either way, it’s hard.

And somewhere in all of this, it’s easy to forget why you started in the first place.

When following your dream becomes another source of stress

I’ve spent more than 20 years working in HR and have seen first-hand the impact stress can have on people’s health, from strokes to nervous breakdowns. I’ve supported people through occupational health processes, but my understanding of stress became much more personal in 2016, when I collapsed at a Christmas market and was diagnosed with stress.

I couldn’t understand what had happened or, more importantly, how to stop it happening again. Even after going through the recommended therapies, I still felt I didn’t have the answers.

That experience prompted me to learn much more about stress, what it does to our brains and bodies, and how we can build resilience.

One of the biggest misconceptions I had was around resilience itself.

I thought I was resilient because I could jump off a business flight, organise a family meal, put the laundry on and prepare for the following day without missing a beat.

It turns out, I had resilience completely wrong!

Resilience isn’t about how much you can squeeze into a day, how well you cope with pressure or how long you can keep going without a break. It’s about having the capacity to navigate challenges, recover and adapt.

As a founder, you can find yourself in a constant state of doing. There’s always another email, another client to please, another opportunity to pursue or another business goal you haven’t quite reached.

Your brain is responding to all of this. When we’re under pressure, our bodies release hormones to help us deal with perceived threats. That’s useful when we need to react quickly, but when our stress response is continually switched on, it can affect our ability to think clearly, make decisions and recover properly.

Even our own anxious thoughts can contribute to that response.

And here’s something I see time and again: people can be absolutely exhausted, yet struggle to switch off, even when they finally get the opportunity to rest.

I also notice how exhausted people become as the year progresses. After summer, everything seems to ramp up at once. Clients, customers, colleagues and families are all back in full swing. The days get darker, the weather changes and there’s often a long stretch before the next proper break.

For business owners, there’s rarely a convenient moment to stop. But waiting until everything is done before taking a break is a recipe for exhaustion.

Five ways to protect your wellbeing while growing your business

So, how do you build a business you love without burning yourself out? Here are five things I’d encourage every founder to think about.

1. Take a holiday. Yes, really!

I mean it. And no, I don’t necessarily mean going abroad. I mean taking time out.

When you’re trying to please clients, it’s easy to fill every available space in your diary. Before you know it, you’ve not had a proper break for months.

You wouldn’t expect your employees to work continuously without annual leave, so why do you expect it of yourself?

Rested brains are more creative and better able to tackle problems. Your clients also need to understand that you’re not available 24/7. Trust me, they’re not available all the time either!

Put breaks in your diary and treat them as commitments, not optional extras.

2. Have a word with yourself

This one is particularly important.

I used to beat myself up because I hadn’t launched properly. By that, I mean the course and the big dream I’d been working towards.

People were unkind, asking when I was actually going to do it. The fact was, I was doing it. The coaching side was ready, but I wasn’t celebrating that achievement. I was also working practically full-time hours as an associate.

I was measuring myself against an imaginary finish line and telling myself I wasn’t doing enough.

Eventually, I had a word with myself and started recognising what I had achieved.

Our internal conversations matter. If we’re constantly telling ourselves we’re failing, behind or not good enough, we’re adding another layer of pressure to an already demanding situation.

Celebrate the small wins. Recognise how far you’ve come. You don’t have to wait until you’ve reached the big goal to feel proud of yourself.

3. Surround yourself with good people

Find your people. Other entrepreneurs, supportive friends, positive champions and people who remind you of what you’re capable of.

Running a business can sometimes feel lonely, particularly when you’re the person making all the decisions.

You need people who will encourage you, help you see a way through a difficult situation and remind you to take a break (or even book one for you).

Surround yourself with people who celebrate your successes rather than constantly comparing achievements.

Being around positive, supportive people can help us feel more connected, see challenges differently and make the journey far more enjoyable.

Plus, people who provide cake are always worth keeping!

4. Find small ways to help your brain switch off

When you’re already exhausted, being told to go to the gym, meditate or completely overhaul your lifestyle can feel like another job.

So start small.

One of my favourite suggestions is to have a proper belly laugh. Call the friend who always makes you laugh, watch a comedy sketch or find something that makes you chuckle. Give yourself ten minutes.

You could also try a few physiological sighs. Take a gentle inhale, followed by a second short inhale, then a longer, slow exhale. Repeat a few times.

Step away from your screen and stare out of the window while drinking your tea or coffee. Do something kind for someone else. Dance around the kitchen. Pick up a book.

These might seem like little things, but creating moments of pause and enjoyment throughout the day matters.

5. Remember why you started

This is perhaps the most important one.

You probably didn’t start your business because you wanted to spend every waking hour worrying about algorithms, invoices, client enquiries and whether your latest social media post has reached anyone.

You started because you had an idea, a passion, something you wanted to change or a difference you wanted to make.

Don’t lose sight of that.

Your business is yours. You get to decide how quickly you grow, what success looks like and what sort of life you want your business to support.

It doesn’t have to look like everyone else’s. You don’t have to be on every social media platform, launch every new idea or say yes to every opportunity.

You can build a business around your life rather than allowing your business to consume it.

Enjoy the journey, not just the destination

I’ve learnt that resilience isn’t about becoming better at tolerating endless pressure. It’s about recognising what your body and mind need, understanding your stress responses and making recovery part of everyday life.

We spend so much time looking after the health of our businesses. We think about cash flow, customers, growth, marketing and performance. But how often do we give the same attention to our own wellbeing?

I love helping people understand what’s happening to them when they’re stressed and watching them take back some control over their wellbeing. It’s remarkable what can happen when people realise they don’t have to keep operating at full speed.

Building a business is a journey. There will be brilliant days, difficult days, unexpected opportunities and moments when you question what on earth you’re doing.

But your job isn’t to burn out following your dreams. It’s not to swap the nine-to-five for the five-to-nine (and I mean 5am until 9pm!).

Make sure you enjoy the journey along the way.

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